A thought from a song

I listened to Casting Crown's "While you were sleeping" on the way to work this morning. Have you heard it? If you have, you'll know what is coming, but if you haven't, check it out, it's well worth the $1.29 on ITunes.

Casting Crowns reall catches America clearly in talking about first Bethlehem and the the US. How is it that we have been shown the King, yet we still turn away from him. What other man showed his power and grace through miracles and resurrection. I look at the things that many churches focus on and wonder. Why is the greatest miracle of Jesus his own resurrection? With all of Jesus' miracles, why is this seen as the biggest?

It seems to me that it is even greater for him to have raised those who had died as he traveled from town to town. I also see his walking on water as greater. Or his feeding of 5000 with only a few loaves of bread and fish. His greatest sacrifice for man was without a doubt his torture and crucifixion, but his resurrection is held as most important. Why?

Jesus' resurrection and later his ascension to heaven proved that the things he taught were true. We see in scripture that others do "magical" things, just look at Moses and the Pharaoh's magicians. But no one raises any from the dead except for Jesus and those given the gift of resurrection by the Holy Spirit. That is why his resurrection is important. Jesus' resurrection shows that life after death is not a lie, but reality.

"While You Were Sleeping" really makes me think about the birth and resurrection of Christ. Here we see the image of Jesus being born in a barn because "there was not room in the inn." Jesus left his place at the Father's right hand to be a man. How do our lives echo Bethlehem. Do we make sure there is always room for Jesus in our lives? I know I don't always. Even as I search for work in ministry and prepare myself for Seminary, I crowd my schedule so much that I miss community group or time in the word.

Looking around America, we do much the same. How much about Christ have you seen this Christmas? I've seen plenty of Santa. I've seen tons about sales and parties, but not one nativity has been seen in my surroundings. In church and community group we've talked about him, but I haven't seen him much outside of there. This is not to say i have not felt his ever present guidance, I have, but I have not done my side of the bargain and showed him to all around me through my words and actions. In a country where it is okay to kill an unborn child but we have to "save the trees," we have to set out to keep Christ in our lives and to welcome him when he returns. Will he find a place to rest his head when he returns? I'll have a place for him, will you?

Men and infertility

So time for a tough subject. Infertility and it's effects on men.

Most men don't consider infertility as something that effects us. "Hey, the doctor says everything is alright with me, so it's her problem," right? As a Christian and the leader of my household, I find that what effects her, effects me. But beyond that, infertility still effects the man more than I can explain.

We just passed another Mother's Day. Why should that effect a guy, other than to buy his Mom and Mother-in-Law gifts? Maybe those who have never battled with infertility don't see why it should, but as my wife and I do battle with infertility, I have a clear view of the emotional impact of this day. It's a rough time when the world is full of mom this and kids that, but most of all it's hard to spend time around all the new families. They are celebrating a day that should be celebrated, but they are also forgetting all of us who wish we could be celebrating our wives as mothers.

Laura and I have been trying to have a kid for about 2 and a half years, the doctors haven't given us a reason, they have just given us "it might be this" or "it might be that". What am I to do? I pray about this issue a couple times a day and every night, but no change. We spend time and money on fertility treatments (since insurance views it as elective and won't pay for it). We even look into out of the ordinary treatments. No luck yet.

I find myself losing hope. I see friends get off the pill and start trying and a few weeks later I hear they are pregnant. I'm happy for them, but it digs me in to a rut. I want to give up and just bail. I don't want to be around these pregnant women and their husbands, I love kids, but seeing them brings sadness to me. I guess what I am trying to tell you is that I love you guys and your kiddos, and I don't want you out of our lives, but we need some time and understanding in tough times.

So I guess this is really just an explanation of why I feel what I feel, though it might not be a very good one.