An amazing ride!

Whoa! It's been more than 2 months since I blogged last, and I've been amazed by God's grace in this time. Many of you know, Laura and I made the leap to move back to Dallas and persue further education toward ministry. I have been called to men's ministry and she is feeling a stronger call to writing and women's ministry. To understand this a bit better, let me tell you about what has happenned since I wrote last.


Laura and I moved from Austin the first week of January. Now, that in itself isn't amazing, but the circumstances are. We had made the decision to move back in July or August, and started job hunting. As the time drew nearer, neither of us had found anything. I thought I would be working part time at a coffee shop or something similar. Continuing toward finishing my Bachelors online, I assumed this would be my primary occupation. When we arrived in Dallas, I began applying to mundane jobs, just to get a paycheck, and we moved into my parents house. I had a assignment in one of my classes to interview a foreign born Christian leader. I contact Dallas Theological Seminary to see if I could interview Dr. Ramesh Richard. He was unavailable when I needed to talk to him, but they set me up for a meeting the next week. I couldn't use him for my assignment, but I still wanted to talk to him as his sermon on the Ministry Problematic had been so influential to me (I had listened to it on DTS's podcast). I met with him and asked him questions about what brought him to America and Christianity. It was a great conversation. What surprised me is that he asked me for my resume.

Arriving home a few hours later, I pulled up my resume, checked it over and updated it, and sent it off to him. I had only once used my ministry resume before with no results, so I really didn't hope for much. The next week, David, his ministry's operation manager, contacted me wanting an interview.The next 2 weeks was a practice in patience. I met with David and interviewed for a position at RREACH as the assistant to the president (Dr. Richard). David had some difficulty reaching my references, as it was the middle of Dallas' Snowpocalypse '11. We finally had all the contacts made and David offerred me a position, not the original one I interviewed for. The plan was for me to become the online evangelical counselor and help out a little with all of the ministries in the office.

I've been in this job a week now and I'm blown away.

God works in amazing ways. We are going to look at a house tonight and I am looking to trade in my little Celica to get a truck. We pray God will continue to provide wisdom, discernment, and grace in our walk with him.

A Challenge to Men.

So... if you read my blog you know that last weekend I competed in the Warrior Dash. I could tell you about it, but if you really want to know, just look me up on facebook and check out my photos (Laura took them), or check out warriordash.com While prepping for this run I trained harder than I have since I got out of the Army, and I'm going to be pushing myself even harder over the next 2 months getting ready for the 10 miles that is Tough Mudder.

I know a lot of you are asking yourself, "What does this have to do with me?" Well, the fact that I've done this and am continuing doesn't have anything to do with you. What does have to do with you is the question, "What can I do to make myself more ready to stand up and fight on God's front line?" Every one of us has a different job in this, and each of us has the same job as well. The specifics of what God has called each of us to do is known only to you and God, but there are some generals I'd like to point out to you.

First, as men, we are given the mission to be the spiritual leader of our households. This means you need to stand up and be a man. Lead your family, not as a tyrant, but as a servant leader. Jesus led his apostles (called ones) not with an iron fist, but with loving guidance. He showed them the Word, just as you should show your family. He led them into dangerous situations and protected them through the danger. His guidance of 12 men led to you and I being able to receive his salvation and have everlasting life... don't we owe the same to our family? He knows we don't deserve it, but we know they deserve it as much or more than we do. Leading your family also means stepping out of your comfort zone, going to church, and taking on challenges that you're not sure you are ready for. If you don't, how can you expect your children or wife to.You don't like your church? Step up and take a leadership position to help it become a place that is friendly to Men.

Second, we are tasked to be the provider for our family. This has always been a rough one for me. I'm not sure how money figures into this one. Am I failing if my wife makes more than me? No. God does not tell us to be the earner, he tells us to be the provider. This means that we take the task of being the provider and giving our family what they need. Your wife can work and make more than you, but if something were to happen and she was unable to bring home that paycheck, make sure you have plans in place to replace the income or do without. Spend time ensuring that you are not in debt and that you are free of the chains of financial burden to others. Teach your family how to manage the money you have, and help them to reach their goals. Use the provision that God has given and be a steward, not a scrooge. Continue to make yourself a better leader in this area and in the spiritual realm.

Third, man is called to be the protector. Does this mean you have to have a gun? Nope. It means you have to have the plans in place to protect your family. If something happens, what do you do to protect them. What is the first thing you grab when your home catches fire? Your computer? Your car? Your family? If you said anything but family, you need to reevaluate your priorities. American men are taught from a young age it is all about our "stuff", but the Bible teaches us differently. Jesus even challenged the rich man to give everything away and follow Him. Would you? If the answer is no, you need to look at what you are holding on to. Protection is most important when we look at this from a spiritual view. There will always be things that we can not protect against, but the one thing we can protect from is Hell. If we lead our homes as God has called us, we lead our loved ones to His side, and thus to everlasting life.

Okay, so how does the Warrior Dash play into this for me? I found that I was becoming increasingly unhealthy and lazy, sitting in front of the TV, XBox, or PC all night, every night. In stepping up and dedicating myself to do a 5k and later a 10 mi run, I gave myself goals. I made a plan and I stuck to it, even with the bumps in the road. That is how it played into God's calling. I followed a plan, just as we must follow a plan that God has given us.

So here's my challenge to you, Men. This Advent, Step up and make a plan. Read the Gospel and Paul's Epistles. Look at and study what we as men are called to be. And then make a plan to do this. Not just a goal, but a written plan. You don't have to share it with anyone, just stick it in your wallet and look at it every once in a while. If you follow this plan, you will find out amazing things. Your family life will improve. You will grow in you understanding of God. You will grow in your self confidence. And you will achieve in ways you never dreamed.

Remember, the difference between a dream and a goal is a plan. So make a plan and see how deep the rabbit hole goes!

Warrior Dash... Warrior Spirit... God's Special Forces

What is it that God wants out of me? Does he want me to be 10 foot tall and bulletproof? No, he would have made me that way if he did. Does he want me to be a business or political leader? No, he'd have groomed me for that. Does he want me to be a special forces soldier? Kind of. Let me give some background on this.

I've been reading "Risk" by Kenny Luck. It about giving your life over to God. What is it that make a special operations soldier great? Its his willingness to put his job before anything else. Is he the fittest in the military? Nope, probably not. Is he the smartest in the military? Maybe, but that's not what got him his job. What got him where he is was his willingness to sacrifice and to die if necessary for the cause. So what does God want from his warriors?

God wants our 100% dedication to his cause. 25% doesn't work. 50% doesn't work. Even 75% isn't enough. He wants 100%. So what does this mean? It means different things to different men. The key is that everything you do must be done for God's glory. You have to get out and spread the Word.

What am I doing to be a member of God's Special Forces? Over the last year I have made huge changes in my life. I have taken my life in a new direction. I was going to school for theatre and planning on opening a Haunted House. Now I am finishing up a BA in Christian Studies, setting my sights on Seminary and feel called to Men's ministry. Along with this, I am getting back in shape. I have started Insanity, an intense cardio training program, and I am going to be running the Warrior Dash in November. I spend daily time in the Word and I invest in friends, family, and coworkers, even when they are resistant to it. God is a daily part of my life, and my life shows it. My wife and I are happier than we have ever been before. We are succeeding even when we don't know what we are doing.

So, living a life as a soldier in God's Special Forces isn't about getting out and starting am ministry. It's about making your life a ministry. Get out and make people ask you what it is about your life that is so great, and tell them. God gives us all skills that he uses for a special duty, and God uses you for those things he had prepared you for. Stop doubting him and go out and do his work.

Day 1 Complete, Day 2 coming fast!

So I did the first day of Insanity: Dig Deeper and Fit Test. I felt like I was going to fall out. There were points when Shawn T was yelling to push it harder and I couldn't even get off my hands and knees. My results are better than i thought they would be, but I'm going to have to push harder and dig deeper today. one thing has changed for me though. I feel able. Yesterday I was worried I would not be able to finish the test, but today, I know I can do this. I feel more alive and more awake. I feel my muscles ready to go again. No pain. That is the biggest thing for me. I don't feel pain today. How can that be? Shawn drove me to muscle failure on the push-up jacks and the plank obliques, but I'm not in pain today. I'm eating better (though I'm not eating quite right yet) and I got great sleep last night (even with the dog waking me up for water and to go out!)

I am convinced that each day is going to be better. I'm going to push further and dig deeper. I will reach targets that I never reached in the Army and then go farther.

One interesting thing is that the last day is actually going to be postponed 1 day. I will be competing in the Warrior Dash here in Austin on November 20th. I'm going to put the fit test off until Monday (or maybe Sunday) while I compete in this run. I feel like this program is going to make me able to push myself through the 3.2 miles and 11 obstacles in 35 minutes or less, 10 minutes faster than I had originally set me goal.

In all things, I give God the glory. It is because of him that I am doing this and because of him that I can compete. Thank's to God that I have the strength and I ask him for the perseverance to push further, faster, and harder than I ever have before.

Words of a true Role Model

"I love this game. I have passion for this game. I've done what I can to contribute to this team. We made it this far, and it's unfortunate to not be able to play. I'd have given everything I have to be out there with my team. I always give God the glory. I never question things. God is in control of my life, and if nothing else, I know I'm standing on the rock."

Colt McCoy never got to win the National Championship, but as the Texas quarterback said, "God is in control." Seems like this is a guy who is going to be able to face and overcome any roadblock or challenge placed in front of him. He may shed some tears for lost opportunities, but he won't question God's sovereignty.  This is a short one, but just want all of us to take a minute and think, "Could I say the same thing?" Let's look to Colt and follow his lead, standing on The Rock.

Interests....do they work against or for my calling?

      Some of you know my big interests, others don't. I'll fill you in. I've been a haunted house fan/actor/designer/anything else since I was 14, I love them and have a blast doing them. Role Playing Games, by this I mean Dungeons and Dragons, Deadlands, and other table top games, but loosely include Larps and Miniature gaming. I am also starting to play Necromunda. And lastly, Steampunk. The music and the fashion/cosplay DIY attitude.

       Let me break down my thoughts here. First thing, the Haunted Houses. I enjoy working on them, building them, acting in them, and making people jump. I have in the past played almost any type of character you can think of, but this year I turned down a lead role in a haunt at Richard Garriot's property because they were using a Demon Summoning theme. The industry as a whole has moved away from demons, they are nothing but trouble. They give religious activists something to strike at and cost too much time and money to do. The industry has recognized that insane people, gore, zombies, and vampires are more scary anyways. Themes tend more toward the living dead than the demon, more the asylum than the satanist lair. I never do anything that I feel is against my faith..period, but some people look at simply being involved in a Halloween industry as bad.

     Role Playing Games, Dungeons and Dragons got a bad rap in the '80s as a Satan worship game. While the game does not use a Judea-Christian God, it does not use Satan either. The rulebooks clearly state that the information of evil alignments are only included for use by the Dungeon Master(the guy telling the story). Basically D&D is a story telling game where the DM tells the over arching story and the players tell their characters actions in that story. There is no worshiping, not rituals, and no wearing of outfits or use of real weapons, but that's not what everyone gets told by the extremists. Other types of RPGs do include acting, Amtgard, a national live action medieval combat game uses padded pvc as swords and the players wear homemade costumes simulating fantasy characters. No one thinks they are really casting a spell when they throw a bean bag to represent a fireball. No one thinks their leather armor will stop a real sword or arrow, and no one calls on demons to carry out their bidding. Warhammer, Warhammer 40K , Necromunda and other miniature games, they use 28mm metal figures to wage a fantasy battle either on the large unit level or on the squad level around a map of miniature buildings and terrain. There are a lot of dice rolling around a table and rulers used for movement, but nothing seems ungodly there.

     Steampunk, it is a sub-culture of the world shown to us by Jules Verne and HG Wells. This is a world where we have the technology of the modern world, with the clothing, the aesthetics and the culture had a more genteel feel. Sure the culture back then had it's dregs, but the way it is seen by modern man is much more chivalrous. In the steampunk culture, we wear top hats and have goggles around our necks. We travel in airships and power our creations with steam. Brass and copper bring color to the drab and instead of small and plain, computers are beautiful visual displays before you even turn them on. Our music includes groups like Vernian Process and Abney Park. Some take a different view of steampunk, it is the post apocalyptic view. After a world wide disaster, how could we survive? By building the things we know and love by hand. Things would be bulky and look different, but we as the ingenious children of God, would survive.

   The reason I am thinking about this is that many of my hobbies are not ones that most members of ministry would be involved in. And though I am not a member of ministry now, I am being called in that direction. I keep thinking back to pastors I have known throughout my life. I remember a Chaplain in Iraq who had served for 8 years as an Infantryman before going to seminary. He told me he lived just as every other infantryman before finding Christ and going to Seminary...and then he became a minister to those very guys who he once was one of. One of the pastors at my parents church had a solid shelf in his office dedicated to Stephen King books, which he loved. I have seen pastors who focus on sports and those who focus on music. So, does the fact that my interests are more obscure and that there are more visible fans of these hobbies that are non-christian mean that I shouldn't be involved in them? Or does it mean that I should be more involved in these groups and make it known that I am a Christian and that God is great? I never want to be "that guy", you know the one that shoves his beliefs down your throat and makes you want to go the other way when you see him, but I also refuse to hide my beliefs behind a mask.

    So, I am asking you, and praying, and just plain contemplating. Where are the lines? Some of my interests have been pointed at as evil things, even though I know them not to be. Do I give up my interests because some televangelist begging for your money says they are evil? Or do I continue to participate and share my faith with those around me in those settings? I do not want to be the white glove that comes out dirty, but I do want to reach those others may be afraid to reach.

Trying times

Over the last few days, I have some friends who's family has received some hard hits. The stress caused to this family leaves me asking the question, "How do I help?" God tells us to be cheerful servants, and I know that some of my strongest gifts are mercy and service. I feel drawn to help, but don't know how.

As a medic in Iraq and stateside, it was clear what my purpose was. I provided acute and ongoing care for the soldiers under my watch. This was stressful, but also simple. I had spent years learning not only conventional methods of care, but also unconventional or "ditch" medicine. My skills were tested in Iraq, but not nearly as much as my nerve. We did not lose any members of our unit while we were there, though with great sadness me did lose 1LT Josh Hurley on 11/1/03 after he had been transferred to the HHC. I feel guilt over not being there to save him, but know that I was where I was supposed to be and doing what I could. So while I feel guilt, I know I have no blame.

Now, after leaving the military, leaving EMS, and leaving any job I thought I would have, I am looking into Ministry. Probably outreach, but that is up to God. I find myself seeking ways to serve others and in situations that are so close to home, I am unsure of what to do. I'm told that I'm great in an emergency. Where I often find myself at a loss is afterward. How do I comfort people when I know so little of the situation? Or how do I comfort someone when I don't know the situation at all? I can often empathize with people, as this was something I learned to do in emergency medicine, but this is not always helpful. How do I determine when someone needs me to be the rock for them to lean on or the welcoming shoulder for their tears? I pray God reveals these thing through professors and experience and I pray that he makes himself known to those I am helping through my actions and words.